Dane County, the 51st State?

It’s a well known fact. The rest of us ’sconies regard Madison as an anomoly. It’s not really Wisconsin, which I guess has always been ok because they don’t seem to want to be Wisconsin. I’m not sure who they want to be, but it’s definately not Wisconsin. The only bothersome part is that, despite being a tiny flaw on the face of this state, they seem to think that the rest of us need to be Madison; to which we firmly say “no, thank you.”

However, it would seem that the whole of Dane County has been infected with The Madison, and I’m reaching a point where I think that we should annex the county as a whole and tag it as an individual state thereby Constitutionally limiting the amount of damage that it can do to the rest of us.

See, the problem here is that The Madison has a profound effect on elected official’s heads. It causes them to swell from the inside, creating not only delusions of grandeur, but also a distorted sense of reality (which I would attribute to the brain swelling). This is why it seems that all I can do is shake my head every time news comes from Dane County – particularly where government expansion and power grabs are concerned. I attribute this to be a side effect of The Madison’s delusions of grandeur, because clearly these delusions drive people to think that they are omnipotent in their elected seats. Furthermore, it is abundantly clear that The Madison has a unique power to turn ordinary citizens into lemmings who are more than happy to follow their leaders off a cliff.

So, suffice it to say, it is of no surprise to get my news this morning and find that Middleton had passed a smoking ban. The Madison had worked its way into this city too, which just furthers my concern over The Madison’s control over Dane County. Especially when comments like these escape the Hot Zone:

Outdoor theaters and sports arena seating are also considered public spaces and fall under the ban.

and

In fact, Hilbert said, it’s not the bartenders, but other city residents and non-city residents, who want the city to use its police powers to control the behavior of adults engaging in a legal activity.

and

But Ald. James Wexler called the council’s action a “logical extension” of the city’s existing ban on smoking in restaurants.

And Wexler said it is part of a greater trend.

“Other communities in Dane County are doing this. We are not the first,” Wexler said

and my personal favorite:

“We need to sit down and come up with a new business plan. My business just changed,” Werner said. “I just told 60 to 70 percent of my customers to go home, we don’t want you.”

So despite the challenge of reality, The Madison marched on and the city of Middleton went lemming as the excuse of “everybody else is doing it, so we might as well too” prevailed over logic and reasoning.